


nightmare

by herzschlagjaeger



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Helplessness, M/M, Nightmares, Potions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-29
Updated: 2018-08-29
Packaged: 2019-07-04 06:44:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15835908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/herzschlagjaeger/pseuds/herzschlagjaeger
Summary: Harry had a nightmare and Draco had no real plan to help his lover, only words to fill the space between them, which was mostly filled with helplessness.





	nightmare

Harry woke up and his chest rose and fell quickly. He knew it was just a dream, but it still felt real. He felt the fear flow through his body as if it were hot lava; burning him alive. The terrible images ate into his head as if they were annoying parasites that wanted him to collapse. Harry wished he could turn off his thoughts and dreams without taking his potion, but unfortunately it wasn’t that easy.

He shivered as he sat up and looked around. Nights like these killed him. Harrys thoughts, dreams and memories were worse than what he had seen in the war because his fantasy made everything even darker. He imagined what would have happened if he hadn’t defeated Voldemort and how dangerous it had been for all of them to just … die. 

His breath quickened as he thought about how he should have survived without Hermione, Ron or … Draco. At the mere thought of it, his mind went blank. Harry stared straight ahead empty-eyed and got goose bumps as he remembered fragile screams, deep pain and the cold that came from the Dementors. Almost so cold like right now; he was freezing and hugging his own knees.

The dream was almost forgotten again and Harry only remembered a few fragments, but those few bits of memories were enough to keep him awake and shaking.

"Look at me."

Harry felt Draco’s hands on his back and shoulders, but he couldn’t bring himself to look up. He shook his head weakly and Draco pulled him into his arms without hesitation. Draco’s movements were calm and slow, so Harry couldn’t tell if he was doing it because he was still tired, or because he didn’t want to unsettle Harry.

"Did you take your potions before going to sleep?", Draco asked quietly into the darkness of their bedroom.

Harry could only shake his head again, knowing that the small vial was still standing untouched on his nightstand. He didn’t want to take the potion, preferably never again, even though it kept his nightmares away. The next day, after taking the potion in the evening, he usually felt sick, exhausted and broken. As if the potion suppressed the dreams during the night, but in the morning, they destroyed Harry’s head like a tornado, which left the foundations of a house but made it uninhabitable. 

"I couldn’t. We both want to go to the Weasleys tomorrow morning and I have … I have so much to do when I’m at work in the afternoon. There’s the report for Robards and the meeting with…"

Draco tightened his hug as Harry spoke hastily and rambled. Although Harry was now distracted by his nightmares, he still didn’t relax and was tense.

"Calm down a little bit and don’t worry so much," Draco said. 

"It’s three o’clock in the morning, so you don’t have to think about work, Harry," he added.

Harry swallowed hard and pulled his lower lip between his teeth.

"But if I don’t distract myself, then I’m thinking of my nightmares again," Harry whispered, trying to focus on Draco’s closeness. He felt Draco’s warm breath on the back of his neck and hoped that they could stay that way for the rest of night.

"You could just take off tomorrow, and after we went to the Weasleys we could have a day together," Draco suggested, not knowing what else to say to break the sudden silence between them and Harry’s tension. Several minutes passed before Harry spoke again.

"No, I can’t, as I said, I have to finish the report tomorrow and I have to prepare the meeting before we …"

"Okay, okay, I understand," Draco lied as he felt Harry get more nervous and breathe faster again. Sometimes a little lie was better than telling the truth. Draco knew there would be no point in arguing with Harry about work in the middle of the night. He ran his fingers calmly over Harry's arms and felt the tense and trembling muscles under his touch. 

"You know, sometimes it’s not important to do something, only is it important for you to be something. Be grateful, be satisfied, be happy and loving as always. You don’t have to stress yourself over things like work and always do something. Just being is enough too," Draco said quietly, hoping Harry understood what he meant, even though Harry was probably still confused from his own thoughts and nightmares before.

"And for the nightmares … we’re finding a better solution. I promise you", Draco said and was glad as he felt Harry relax a little bit. For this night, Draco's words seemed to be enough, and tomorrow morning, with the sun rising behind the hills near their house, he would think again about how he could help Harry more with his nightmares. For now Draco had no real plan, only words to fill the space between them, which was mostly filled with helplessness.

**Author's Note:**

> \- If you find mistakes while reading, then I’m really sorry. English is not my first language.


End file.
